Tag: psalm 61

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Hear My Cry

Hear my cry, O God;
   attend unto my prayer.
From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee,
   when my heart is overwhelmed: 
lead me to the rock
   that is higher than I.
For thou hast been a shelter for me,
   and a strong tower from the enemy.

Psalm 61:1-3, KJV

(technology defeated me; I tried to hide this at the bottom and auto-play it, but it just won’t work; give it a click and read on)

In the early 90s, the majority of the music we sang in church was simply scripture set to music. Of course, music is a powerful mnemonic device, but I believe it is the power of God’s word that has cemented the words of these songs in my mind, heart, and spirit. Even today, the phrase “and when my heart is overwhelmed…” is likely to arise, unbidden, from my unconscious, set to Kent Henry’s 1993 music.

However, if I’m truthful, my heart is rarely overwhelmed. I’d like to say it is the fruit of walking with God for nearly 6 decades. I like that a lot; sounds very spiritual. My faith in God is just so strong that no matter how bad things get, I trust in him. Yeah, that sounds like something a Pharisee would say.

Maybe it’s the survival instinct of chronic illness that closes down before anything gets too intense. My mother said that she knew something was wrong before she knew something was wrong, because she watched me pull into myself before the physical symptoms were evident. I’m not sure I ever really came out.

Or perhaps my sinful, broken heart just doesn’t feel like it should. A couple of related blogs I read recently suggest that the more we love, the more injustice offends us. A child starves in Africa and I can cluck my tongue, wag my finger, and say piously, “someone should do something about that.” But let my child be wronged, and my righteous anger will flare and I will gird my loins for battle.

That, perhaps, hints at another reason my heart isn’t overwhelmed. I can more easily mask pain with anger, lashing out, scorching the earth before me, than I can allow myself to feel the full weight of the evil that confronts me. I am skilled at anger, and a warrior at heart; let me go to battle and deal with the feelings later. Except I never do.

Recently, I’ve been glimpsing hints of overwhelmed. One of my friends is an incredibly gentle and caring woman. She has been visited by enormous and repeated grief, and is facing it yet again. As we have been praying for her family member, we cannot help but also pray for her. I begin to taste the magnitude of her pain; suddenly the word “overwhelmed” is no longer an abstract poetic verse, but a tumultuous storm threatening to wash away everything in its path.

Similarly, the unrest coming out of Minneapolis is a stark reminder that too many in my country are still marginalized, dehumanized, belittled, and abused. It is too easy to allow this not to touch me as I sit enthroned in my basement cyber-kingdom. It is too easy to allow the anarchy, riots, and violence to drown out the outrage. Appropriate outrage. Overwhelming outrage.

So this is where we come to hope: “When my heart is overwhelmed; lead me to the rock that is higher than I.” Being overwhelmed means that it is too much for you to bear; too much for you to hold. Overwhelmed is the storm surge rising, a tornado uprooting trees, a mudslide erasing houses. It is a God-sized problem. You need a God-sized God.

I still remember vividly, in the midst of my deepest despair and the excruciating pain that seemed like it would never end, the mental image of me clinging to God like a young child might wrap himself around his father’s leg. When life is more than you can bear, stop bearing it alone. As a rock is immovable in a storm, so God can weather the storms of your life.

“For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy.” Trust is built from experience. Like the psalmist, I have lived long enough to have enough experience to know that God is faithful. This isn’t self-righteous Pharisee-speak; it is the first-hand voice of experience. God has shown himself faithful to me and through me.

I’m no longer content to hide from the powerful pain and sorrow that is unavoidable in this world. I’m learning to only fight the battles my commander tells me to, but that leaves me open and vulnerable. The best place to hide is in the tower of my God.

Always simple, never easy. SDG.

Some other links that are worth reading. This is not an exhaustive list, but just some of the best that came across my path.